Open "Mike" Night

My pal Mike Fortino has decided to take up a career in stand-up comedy. Vinnie Brand's Stress Factory in New Brunswick offers aspiring stand-up acts the opportunity to show what they've got like Seth Rogen in the movie Funny People on select Wednesdays throughout their calendar, so he has decided to go on 1/6.


He debuted around the time of Halloween a couple of months ago at my other friend Bernie's father's 50th birthday roast where he had the crowd going with ethnic jokes (looks like MTV's Jersey Shore will provide a blowout of new material with this one), towns in NJ where people are from and why they turn out the way they do as a result, his own struggles with alcoholism, and the dick & fart jokes inspired brilliantly by his heroes Jay & Silent Bob - New Jersey's Finest. At the roast, he pushed the envelope but couldn't go much beyond that because there were children and grandparents present (the same grandparents I chugged Sambuca in front of during Bernie's high school graduation party...class, class, class). At the Stress Factory, however, there will be no holds barred.


The stakes are high during Open Mic Night. Careers can be launched if the comics steal the show and the laughs flow like wine and beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano. Or dreams can shatter in five uncomfortable minutes of jeers and comments from a tough crowd (they don't call it the "Stress" Factory for nothing). New Brunswick is located on Route 1, by I-287 and is very close to Rutgers - chicks bro, chicks - and according to Marilyn Monroe, "If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything," - anything, eh?? However, if the roast was any sort of a preview for Mike's performance this coming Wednesday, it should make for a good show. Doors open at 7, $5 cover, and there's a two-drink minimum per person (except for the recovering alcoholic on stage). Come through, it should be a good time, and I won't be job-searching.